Out and About

Blowin' Bubbles

Our emails have been blowing up with requests for more pics.  So, without further ado I present pics from Lucy's first week in America.

Pee Pee in the Potty

I can take almost no credit for this but our little girl, just 19 months old, has peed in the potty 5 times and gone poo poo there once today.  We were told that she was potty trained while we were in China and weren't really sure if we could rely on this info.  Considering her grief reaction we really didn't expect her to be able to control her tiny little bladder.  Over the last few days we've been able to read her non-verbal cues (you know that grunty, kind of getting red in the face with a funny stare that they get) & have been asking her if she needs to go about every hour.  One thing that we've learned is that if we ask her if she has to go and she replies in the affirmative that we need to take her immediately to the potty and put her on it.  This seems really obvious but in our excitement Trav & I both have taken her to the bathroom and while taking off her diaper said again 'pee pee in the potty!'.  This promptly results in a case of 'pee pee all over your hand that is between her legs'.  She's a tiny little thing but she let's loose enough liquid to soak her pants, the floor and your hands.  If she does do the deed in the potty she gets candy.  Like her brother, this is the period in which she will do almost anything for a Skittle.  

Tyson continues to be a great big brother.  Lulu likes to sit right on his lap and he lets her, even if he can no longer see what he was trying to do or play with.  She loves to kiss him.  If he responds to her pursed lips with a peck on the forehead she leaves her lips there until she gets the smooch that she wanted.  

I thought that I would have more time before Lucy began to have an opinion about her clothes.  To this day Tyson will wear just about anything that I pick out.  Baby Bird on the other hand has her own opinions.  She didn't like what I had picked out so she went into her drawer and picked out what she wanted to wear.  She also grabbed a few handfuls of other clothes that she carried around the house today.  I would love to know what goes through her mind.
We'll try to get more pictures posted this weekend.  Travis is back to work & I'm keeping busy.  BTW Lucy is doing pretty well without him, Thank the Lord, but in the afternoons checks the driveway repeatedly until he gets home.  She loves her daddy.
Thank you for all of your well wishes & prayers.  This is such a joyful time in our lives and we're glad that you all are in it with us.
MJ

All is Well

It's now Sunday night and all is well.  We all slept last night, at least off and on.  Tyson got up at about 2 am and stayed up until he fell asleep while sitting up in a chair at dinner.  Poor guy.  Lucy seems to like her new home.  It's so much fun to hear her little feet slapping around on the tile.
Baby Bird is still as cute as can be.  She giggles a lot and says 'candy', 'tickle tickle' and 'banana'.  I am so happy to report that she is letting me care for her and love on her!  She still prefers Baba but lets me love her for hours at a time.  It's so exciting for me to finally get to hold this little girl that I've been working towards for such a long time.  Her skin is smooth and her hair is silky.  It's funny that it's been two weeks and it's only now that I can say these things about her.
I wanted to say thanks and hi to everyone who sent us welcome home messages.  We can't wait to see you all and to introduce you to the littlest Jacques.

Home at Last (is it 5am or 5 pm?)

We are finally home!  It's been a rough two days of travel but we finally made it back to the house at 430 this morning, just five hours after our planned arrival  (I must admit it felt like more - that delay in Detroit really took it out of us).  We finally got off the ground at about 230 and that pilot pushed it because we made it to Norfolk in record time.  By the time we left Detroit we had spent as much time there as we had on the plane from China. Got the kids to sleep by about 6am - took forever to get Lucy to sleep this morning.  And then we slept and slept and slept and I couldn't pry my butt out of bed until after 4pm.  It took the better part of an hour to get the rest of the fam up.  We are all up now, feels like we should be eating breakfast.  Anyhow, we are are home, we are awake, we've yet to unpack and we've got to get these kids back on an EST schedule. Thanks to all who read the blog and made comments - now that we can see them we have gone back and read through all your thoughtful commentary.   We'll keep posting pics of the family and our new, wonderful addition.
TJ

More Delays

Bad news; our flight from Detroit to Norfolk has been delayed from 940pm to 200am. Ugh! This trip is never ending. We will be in Detroit longer than we were on the plane from China to America. The SkyClub closes at ten so we have lost the relative comfort of that. Irony is that we flew through two typhoons on China with only a little delay but some thunderstorms in the US are going to cost us 5-6 hours minimum. The kids are beyond exhausted and the adults are dizzy with fatigue. I've never been this tired. Hopefully home by 5am.
TJ

Safe and Sound in Detroit

Just a quick post to say that we have landed in Detroit and negotiated our way through customs and immigration.  Lucy became a US citizen at 1150am when our plane touched down in the good old US of A.  We are doing our long layover thing in Detroit and will arrive in Norfolk tonight at about 1130pm.  The 14 hour plane trip was pretty rough with the little one only allowing me to hold her the whole time.  So basically I've been awake now since 11pm Wednesday night (EST).   That will make over 48 hours without sleep.  Pray for this last leg as I am really dragging and hoping Lucy will let Melissa hold her.
TJ

More Lucy Pics

GZ Zoo Pics

See the below for the blog entry that goes with this pic.

TJ

Farewell Guangzhou

This will probably be the last post we make from China.  Tomorrow is our last day in mainland China; we check out of our hotel at 6pm and fly to Hong Kong; after a quick overnight in HK we're back at the airport for the big hop across the Pacific to America.  Sixteen hours from Hong Kong to Detroit, then a 9-hour layover in Motown and a 2-hour hop to Norfolk.  We are supposed to be landing at home at 1130PM on Friday night.   I hope after all that time in Detroit the flight would be on time – the best thing about the Detroit layover is going to be that sweet SkyClub.  Here's hoping it works out as well for us on the way back as on the way over because we are going to need it.

 

Lucy Update

Today we had our consulate appointment and went through the oath ceremony for Lucy's US visa.  This was not a naturalization ceremony but it's the closest thing she will ever have to it. As with Tyson, Lucy will become a US citizen (and by default forfeit her China citizenship) the moment our airplane touches down on US soil.  We can even take her through the US Citizen side of the Immigration booths in the Detroit Airport.  She is fully ours in the sight of both the US and the Chinese governments.  Although the oath was a shade anti-climactic, us and the other 50 families who took part in it all cheered when it was concluded.  It represented the last major legal hurdle for all of us in bringing our kids home from China – a journey that has taken each of us years to realize.  In that regard it was really neat.

 

Lucy is cleaving more and more to her Mama everyday; it is a slow, painful process but all the sweeter for how hard it has been.  She actually allowed Melissa to hold her on two occasions today for about 20 minutes each.  This is a huge milestone for both of them.  For her part, Melissa just keeps chipping away at Lucy's resistance.  She has been such a trooper through this rejection period.  I know in just a little while we will look back and have a tough time remembering how hard this was.  But right now it's a struggle every day.  Lucy has been in my arms every waking moment for 10 days – and everything I have is covered in Lucy slobber and food castoffs.  I, for one, welcome any time she is willing to jump into her Mama's arms; Lucy and I are good and bonded together.

 

Tyson is learning everyday day how to be a better big brother and his love for Lucy is showing more and more in a hundred little ways every day.  From holding her on the bus to greeting her each morning with a kiss, he is fabulous big bro.

 

And Mom and Dad have been a Godsend – helping out in a ton of ways every day.  They've taken care of Tyson when Melissa and I needed to be doing paperwork or attending to Lucy; they've held the breakfast table for us every morning and taken Tyson up to get his morning ration of freshly cooked noodles.  They've adventured out on the town with us as we sought to escape the cloying confines of our hotel room – even into the most God-awful heat imaginable.  They've been perpetual good sports through all the legalities of the adoption process and sat with us through all the boring proceedings.  Melissa and I simply can't thank them enough for all that they have done.

 

Well, Melissa has been packing up our stuff the whole night and it's getting late.  The kids are finally asleep and all is quiet.  Tomorrow we start our adventure home.  Pray for travel mercies and on-time flights.  I will try posting from the Detroit airport when we finally get there.

TJ

No Spitting or Nose Clearing

The fact that the Chinese need a reminder of this when they are in "international" company says volumes about the gulf between Chinese and Western cultures.  Hawking up a loogey at the swimming pool is perfectly normal behavior to the Chinese, but the rest of us think it's gross so they put up signs for the Chinese nationals to be on their best behavior when around us foreigners.  So, no spitting or nose clearing when Westerners around.  Ironically, our "polite" custom of blowing our nose into a tissue is a real no-no to the Chinese. We've compiled quite a few of these foibles in our travels in the Far East (ie, things that Westerners would consider rude but is accepted here) For instance, the Chinese don't think twice about staring, pointing or talking about big, white Anericans in public.  Add two Chinese kids to the mix and you can watch it melts their brains – it's physically impossible for them to stop staring and they do not flinch when you catch them at it.  Walk through a public park and every eye is on you.  Walk into a room and all conversation stops, tea cups freeze halfway to their mouths, chewing stops and starting commences.  We might as well be made of fire for all the attention we garner in any public place. It's unsettling at first but then you get used to it - then it gets old again like "yeah, I know, I'm a big white guy with a Chinese kid, stare away." And on this trip I have found that looking them in eyes, saying 'hello' and smiling tends to break through the ice and may even get a smile back.  But even that looses it's luster when you have to do it every 10-15 seconds the entire time you are out in public.

 

Apparently, napkins are a real luxury item here because the only place we can get them without creating a stir is at McDonald's (and the buffet at our Western hotel).  Everywhere else and we get a cocktail napkin – if you ask for more you get a stack of cocktail napkins. And about half the time we can't get a fork for Tyson, who has good intentions but no skills with chopsticks.  C'mon people we've got two children here, one less than 2 years old.  They are going to be messy.  A cocktail napkin just ain't gonna cut it!  Sometimes I think they are just jerking us around, watching the stupid American's try to eat rice and noodles with chopsticks and no napkins!

 

Also on the gross out meter – but perfectly fine to them – is to dish out food from serving plates to you own with the same chopsticks that have already been in your mouth!  I barely know the other families from the travel group and they seem to be great people but swapping chopstick spit in the eggplant dish is just too much.  Thankfully they have largely condescended to providing serving spoons for the 'picky Americans'.

 

In reality these things show me how much of the stuff we take as "givens", such as no spitting in the pool, really are just cultural norms that we take for granted.   Here in China it is perfectly acceptable for your kid to drop pants at the zoo and pee into the moat at the hippo paddock.  Kids gotta pee somewhere right?

 

However there are a few things I've seen here that no amount of cultural relativism can explain away.  Here are a few signs that should have been posted but weren't.

 

Please Don't Litter On Your Greatest National Treasure

I'm speaking of the Great Wall here.  After seeing Chinese nationals toss their empty bottles off the Wall not once but twice in the span of an hour I was ready to make my own sign.  But seriously, you shouldn't need a sign for that.  It's the Great Wall of China for crying out loud!  What could your empty Sprite bottle possibly contribute to the grandeur of the Great Wall?  What kind of callous disregard do you have to have to toss your trash on one of the Seven Wonders of the World? 

 

Here's another sign I want to get made.

Please Do Not Throw Trash at the Monkeys

This must be a great national pastime based on the shocking volume of trash we saw in the monkey pit at the GZ Zoo yesterday – there were two liter soda bottles, hamburger wrappers, plastic water bottles, toilet paper, napkins (how'd they get those?), plates, banana peels, apple cores, basically everything you'd find in your trash can at home.  In the three minutes we were standing there I saw a guy toss a half empty water bottle at a monkey (much to the amusement of the crowd) and someone else spit a mouthful of water on another (again with the spitting).  And I've already mentioned the peeing on the hippo exhibit. So, I'm guessing that PETA doesn't have a chapter here in Guangzhou.  It was disgusting and appalling.  Like I said, some things even cultural relativism can't explain away.

 

So the next time you swing through China, leave the Kleenex at home and work on your spitting instead.  You'll fit right in here.

 

Guest Blogger: Nai Nai

Tuesday July 20^th Trav's 37^th Birthday.  Guest writer Nai Nai here.

 

Well all, for better or worse, you're stuck with a post from me today.  It's sort of a birthday present for Trav, not having to come down to post at 11pm when we're all asleep.

 

For those of you that know me you know I operate with a stream of conscious thought…always thinking and processing and now typing.  So I'm going to give you a perspective on the trip from Gpa and me.  China is so much more than I imagined.  Let's start with Beijing.

 

That first night Dave and I ventured out onto the streets of Beijing.  We went into a restaurant and ordered by pointing at pictures…no English and we still don't know what we ate. We talked and laughed along with the wait staff and had a very good time.  It was there that we discovered that our size and my white hair were going to be subject of much discussion and photographs along the journey. The next day the whole group did the fastest tour of Beijing imaginable.  It was pouring while we were in Tianenmen Square and The Forbidden City.  Picture 40,000 people walking from a 10 lane highway onto to a two "lane" cart path all holding umbrellas right at eye level. Fortunately, we made it through the day without being blinded. Onto The Great Wall and a truly amazing site. One just can't imagine a million men literally carrying the bricks on their backs up slopes so steep your hands and feet are on the ground at the same time.  Once at theior destination…they lay the bricks in place…turn around and do it again…and again….  For lunch we ate more amazing Chinese food and then toured , a tour fantastic cloisonné factory. 

 

Well on Sunday we were in Nanchang and awaiting the arrival of our precious Lucy. I wish I could describe the unbelievable emotions I felt as we walked into the room and there she was…so cute...but crying her eyes out. Evidently, she had just been taken from her foster mom by a woman who fit my stereotype of someone from the Red Army.  She thrust Lucy into Melissa arms saying here's your baby, here's  your mama, walk!!!  I was in charge of the videoing so I'm sure it will be the worst ever done as I tried to follow Melissa around the room while tears streamed down my face. So for a few agonizing numbing minutes Melissa walked with her and then the "Red Army ladies" said goodbye and we were to go back to our hotel room.  Done, final, she was ours then. You've read lots from the kids relating the ensuing couple of days, but I can tell you when I think of that exchange I'm still numb from the whole transaction.  That evening Dave and I were put on a quest to find some milk.  Walking the torn up streets of Nangchang was quite an experience.  No sidewalks, so you just walk out in the street hoping that no buses, motorcycles, bicycles, cars or people run you over.  After several unsuccessful quests in "bodegas" we spotted good old Mickey D's down a couple of blocks.  Once there, even they didn't understand milk, so I resorted to "mooing".  They understood that, laughed and brought us 6 cartons of milk….mission successful. We truly loved the people of Nangchang.  Every afternoon Dave and I would go down for coffee while Dave worked.  They knew what we drank, how often to give us refills and they could come practice their English on us.  We always spoke to everyone, smiled and thanked them. The beautiful day-consierge, who we spoke to many times a day, upon our leaving came up to us with tears in her eyes telling us how special we were and thanked us for acknowledging her presence.  I, of course, cried too, hugged her and Dave said every Chinese woman in the place went ohhh in a good way.  Remember I'm old, my size and gray hair gave me much credibility with them and that I would hug this unnoticed female was something. Dave too had lots of folks wanting to have their picture taken with him.  As our guide/friend Allison says we're like "Rock Stars"….pity the future of rock music in the US.

 

So now we're posting from Guangzhou, another totally different city.  Beijing of course is millions of people, lots redone for the Olympics.  Nangchang is 6 million people, home of the Revolution, but with a much more working class feel to it.  Guangzhou is 12-13 million people…very big cityish…definitely not as easy to feel at home in as Nangchang.  It's been unbelievably hot here.  I'm saying 95 with a heat index of 123 or so.  I never knew I could produce so much perspiration…ok it's sweat.  That hasn't dampened (no pun intended) our spirit too much.  On an outing to Shaiman Island, we took Tyson and walked the Island.  Came upon sort of their rendition of Central Park, where everyone exercises, dances and sing.  Believe it or not there was a group doing swing, two step/ salsa dancing to English songs.  Dave and I just couldn't resist and had to get in the swing dancing to "I Like Bread and Butter, I Like Toast and Jam"  All the locals laughed and cheered and even old Tyson thought it was pretty cool that his Nai Nai and Gpa danced with the Chinese.

 

Yesterday was Zoo day and only the human animals were out and about.  Most of the "wild" animals tried to stay in as much shade as possible.  Tyson and Gpa tried to see every bird, beast and fish in the place.

 

We as grandparents have tried to be as helpful as possible with not only our family but others on our trip, even Dave has helped a few Chinese folks along the way.  I think our biggest question is when to help, when to take Tyson and how to get some "facetime" with Lucy.  Tyson's been really very good and has Lucy looking at him and mimicking him all the time. Lucy still lights up our world when she turns those big brown eyes on us and says "Gpa" Nai Nai" and throws her head back and laughs.  Both Dave and I feel blessed in so many ways.  We are so proud of our family. Travis and Melissa are remarkable parents.  They too are learning as they go along, but doing a beautiful job of weaving the old with the new.  Giving much love to each child and all in our group as well.  Melissa, with her remarkable planning skills has shared many of her supplies with those less prepared than she. And that formerly shy Tyson of two years ago is the non-stop talking ambassador of our group and at times even surprises himself by going up and talking to Chinese children.  We know there's lots going on in his little head.

 

 Believe it or not I have left out volumes of feelings, sights, smells, sounds and all the other things that make up China.  But I've rambled far too long now. So we send much love to you all.

 

Maureen/Nai Nai and Dave/Gpa

GZ Pics 4

GZ Pics 3

GZ Pics 2

Chinglish Shirts

Shirts with English print are all the rage here in China.  It doesn't matter what it says as long as it's English. We've been to a lot of public places here in the last few days and seen thousands of Chinese nationals in their natural habitats – parks, restaurants, lobbies, streets, the zoo, etc. – and I can safely say that one in every three people is wearing a t-shirt with some sort of English writing on it.  Not French or German but English – or what is clearly meant to be English.  Now, to be fair many of these shirts are "designer" shirts with logos on them like Levis or Reebok or Nike.  But about every tenth one is just something ridiculous or puzzling. Take for instance the shirt of a punkish, defiant teen in the metro yesterday.  It said, "I Alive! You no sweat. I a Rocker!"  with a big NY on both sleeves.  Hmmmmm.  That one stumped me a bit.  Not sure what she thought it said but she wore it like she was shaking a fist at the world.  Rock on, sister!  Less puzzling was the one that simply said, "I Take New York".  

 

Others are just silly, like the person yesterday with the words, "Flower Shirt" over – you guessed it – a graphic of a flower.  Or the one that simply said Apple with an apple in the second P – not the iPod Apple mind you, just a regular apple.  So, I guess it doesn't matter what English you have on your shirt – English letters are cool.  Even if it's jibberish.  Maybe the cool kids have shirts that actually spell something real while the regular kids just get random letters thrown on with a graphic for good measure.   Like the guy today who's shirt had actual words on it.  "Designer Shirt," it said in plaid lettering, with a picture of the Na'vi from Avatar ironed-on underneath.  Clearly top of the line.

 

The only thing I can relate it to is when Americans get a Chinese or Japanese pictogram tattooed on their body and think it says "harmony" until an Asian tells them it really says "broccoli" – except the Chinese can take their shirts off at the end of the day but that American is stuck with Broccoli.  Perhaps they've got it right after all.

 

Nevertheless, I'm begging someone to help me figure this one out.  Big letters across the front of the shirt from top to bottom that looked exactly like this:

 

THE

RTL

GRP

FER

 

See, what I mean?  English letters just for the sake of English letters.  I swear I'm tempted to whip out the camera every time I see a good one – but I don't want to be rude:).  I'll keep a sharp eye out for other good ones and post more later.

 

But, I digress.  Most of you want to hear about Lucy and our exploits in China but I've been jonesing to blog about those shirts for days.

 

Lucy is doing Awesome.  We are making breakthroughs every day.  Little bits of progress that show she is more comfortable with us then ever and getting better.  Today she allowed us to put her in a high chair.  Since we got her, she has clung to me, even during meals – which has made eating very tricky for both of us.  Yesterday she allowed us to put a bib on her for dinner – which spared my shorts their nightly covering in all things food.  I don't mean cheerios and bananas; I'm talking steamed egg, fried noodles, buttered corn, curried beef, fried dumplings– anything sticky, gooey, stinky or brown goes into her mouth and onto my shorts!  Except yesterday she started wearing a bib!  Praise the Lord.  Now only half of that stuff hits my shorts.  Tonight, she did both – bib and high chair – AND she allowed Melissa to feed her!  This is huge since she normally can't stand the sight of Melissa let alone allow her to touch her food.  For the first time, I didn't feed her a thing, and she played with Melis after the meal too.  It was amazing.  Melis was also "allowed" to change her poopy diaper today – a privilege only I have been afforded up until now.  So, things are looking up.

 

Seriously, she is such a bundle of joy…and vinegar.  She has 9 different ways of saying Baba that all mean something different.  Sometimes she can only go to sleep if she's lying on my chest and every morning and evening she sits in my lap for her bottle of milk.  She's a late riser and likes to cuddle in the morning before getting up and her arms do this funny, jerky swing when she is walking all by herself and getting cocky about it.   She has her challenges to be sure but this is the little girl we have been waiting for all these years.  I haven't seen a prettier little girl in China yet – and I mean that.  Even the Chinese people stop us to take pictures of her and tell us "She so beautiful."

 

Well, it's late Monday night here and I better get down to the free wifi zone to get this posted.  More crazy shirts and Lucy news to come.

Baby Bird LuLu

As Trav said, we're staying at a great hotel called The China Hotel.  I love it!  When we came for Tyson we were astonished with how small it was compared to his home province's hotel.  This time we struck with how functional it is.  The refrigerator works (after they switched it out), the AC is cool & there are drawers!  (Okay, little rant here, but really, what were we supposed to do with 4 of us in one room without a single drawer?). 

Lucy is coming out of her shell more and more.  This morning she was almost tolerating my presence and by the afternoon seemed to be at peace with it.  Now I'm only talking about my presence.  If I dare touch her she has a cow.  On the bus ride back from Shamain Island she sat in Tyson's lap so the two of them could look out the window together.  Yup, we got pics. 

Praise the Lord!  The medical exam and shots went much better than expected.  When we went to Shamain Island the first thing we did was get her visa photo taken.  Next we went to the clinic where there were close to 100 families all trying to get their babies through this process.  It was mild mayhem. We zipped through the general procedures but then had to wait as we were the only family in our group whose baby had to get shots.  First they said 3, then 5 and after we had paid a few thousand RMB they changed their minds and only gave her 3. (Thank God for charge nurses).  They also gave us a refund for the unused immunizations.  This is really something that we wish could have waited until we got to the US.  Well, despite our worries, Lucy proved herself to be every bit of the trooper that her brother is.  She cried for a minute or two and then ripped off her apple-shaped band-aids and handed them to me as if to say 'get these out of my sight'. 

Of course we won't really know the state of Lucy's heart until we go to see her cardiologist, but the staff at the exam said that they couldn't hear any issues with her heart.  Woohoo! 

The day proved to be even more amazing as it went on.  Lucy really seems to be coming out of her shell.  She was walking around the room, playing, laughing and smiling.  Times of happiness far outweighed bouts of crying and mourning.  Of course she still loves her Baba but she is letting me into her heart a little at a time. 

LuLu, as she responds to, loves to snack.  I mean all day snacking.  If she could just pick up a diet coke habit I'll know we're one in the same.  She's more of a puffs and cheerios kind of girl but I still like her style.  Sometimes we call her 'baby bird' because when she wants sweets she opens her mouth wide and practically chirps 'ah ah ah'.  Her big eyes just complete the picture. 

Another one of the things that I enjoyed about China is different.  There is a McDonalds just a few hundred feet from our hotel.  In 2008 they had cucumbers instead of pickles and a spicy sauce on their burgers.  We went their tonight and it was just plain old McD's.  Bummer.  After dinner it was drizzling but warm so we went for a long walk.  It started by going up a main street lined with hotels, banks and shops.  To take a different way home we made a right into a neighborhood.  Just behind all of these very western shops was a cool neighborhood.  The back of the apartments faced us so we could see their tenant's laundry and plants and just normal life things.  There were men playing card games in the back of trucks, families eating & kids hanging out with their parents.  Although we were the only obvious westerners it didn't seem to cause as much of a ruckus as it does other places.  Tyson and I stopped for a few cookies.  Together they were only 2.5 RMB, less than 50 cents.  Baby bird didn't see me buy them, but when she saw the bag on my hand later in the trip she chirped out her plea for a few pieces.

Tomorrow we go back to the island for group photos, the infamous 'Red Couch' photos, church and lunch.  We'll keep you updated.  Thanks for all of your thoughts and prayers. 

MJ 

 

Guangzhou At Last

Hello from Southern China!

It's 10pm here so that means it's mid morning to most of you back in the States.  We are on our third of four cities in our whirlwind tour of China.  Today, we flew into the big GZ.  And although we are told it's only twice as big as Nanchang (12 mil vs 6 mil) it FEELS a lot bigger.  First clue, air conditioned airport!  Not only was the terminal air-conditioned but so was the skyway that led from the plane to the terminal!  A far cry from Nanchang, which felt more like a third world country - sweltering terminal, hoofing it across the tarmac and hauling our carry-ons up the LBJ stairs into the airplane. GZ is a huge metropolis by comparison and much more multicultural.  What's more the sidewalks are intact here, which is more than I can say for the last place.  No more schlepping for block after block in mud that really smells like something…more organic… just to get bottled water and a just-off tasting Sprite.

 

We are staying in the same Marriott we stayed in two years ago with Tyson – the room layout is exactly the same – so there is something comforting about it.  We knew where to eat and how to get around the massive lobby and where the 7-11, Starbucks and McD's are.  I know, very American of me, but we've been living it up China style for a week, I want a Starbucks coffee and free wifi!!!

 

Tomorrow we take Lucy for the dreaded medical check-up where she will be poked and prodded by masked, but well intentioned, health officials and more than likely get some shots.  This was the location and occasion for Tyson's first major meltdown two years ago.  He thrashed and bit and peed and screamed at the top of his lungs for over an hour, which is long time when you are in a public space with a kid.  So, needless to say we are a bit leery about what tomorrow will bring with the infinitely more tear-prone Lucy.  Ugh.

 

Speaking of the wee one, she has made major strides in working through her grief these last two days but especially today.  She is just a happier little girl – more prone to laughter then tears.  She does this great thing where she snaps her head back and laughs at the sky when she thinks she has done something cute or clever.  It makes my heart leap to see her with such joy. She has cried so much I feared she stay that way forever.  When she's happy her eyes get really huge and she has this way of looking at you that just melts you – then she grabs the chopsticks ou of your hands and pours the steamed eggs in your lap!  Yeah, she's a spicy one – we're in trouble.

 

We went to the Cantonese place on the first floor of the hotel tonight – they gave us a private alcove all to ourselves and I can't help but wonder if they weren't tucking us away so Kid Dynamo and Princess Pee wouldn't disturb the rest of the customers…nah, that can't be it.  Food was decent but we've had better Chinese since we got here, especially for the price.  That was one thing about Nanchang I will give them credit for – great food for cheap!  Anyways, I'm popping a few Zantac and a Cipro tonight to cover all the bases – let's just say that all our systems are a little "travel weary" at this point.  Nuff said.

 

I will attach a few pics my dad took – one of us in a water-ride at the People's Park in Nanchang yesterday.  All the characters had a striking resemblance to the movie"Shark Tales" with Jack Black and Will Smith – except the colors were a little different – just-off like the Sprite I mentioned earlier.  And they were playing "It's a Small World" instead of "Carwash".  They do that a lot here, especially with Disney stuff, and you look at it and think, Can they do that? Isn't that some sort of copyright infringement?  But no one's stopping them so I guess it isn't worth the fight for the big Dis.

 

The other pic is self-explanatory.  Melt!!!

 

Alright, enough already.  It feels like 2 in the morning and I'm doing the blogging version of blathering and we have a long day ahead of us tomorrow, but I just had to get the word out on our safe conduct to another port of call.  Dreading those shots tomorrow for Lucy – things have been going so well.  She's even caved in and started to call Melissa 'mama' and that is saying something indeed.  Would hate to loose all that ground.  

 

Now I just hope Starbucks still has free-wifi or you will never read this and my ramblings will have been in vain.

TJ

PS - We're in luck!

Moving Day

Travis here.  Today we leave for Guangzhou (GZ) at around noon.  I've been up since 5 with a fussy, sometimes sleeping Lucy who simply MUST stay in the bed next to me - three attempts to put her fast asleep little body into the crib resulted in tears within about 30 minutes.  If I keep her in bed next to me - no such tears.  I think that's called conditioning - and she's doing it to me, not the other way around. When we were here to get Tyson I worried about trying to establish routines and fretting over bad habits he was starting.  I didn't realize that over here none of this is really real - we're just doing everything we can to bide our time until the paperwork comes through and we can go home and do this thing for real.  Over hear you do whatever you have to do to get a better night's sleep, or to get her to stop crying or to eat some food when she is fussy.  Once we get back we'll establish the niceties and routine.

Had to pause in my typing for a few hours since the princess awoke and demanded an audience. She and I got a shower and got dressed and put in pigtails - all at about 100 decibels of crying.  Fun, fun.

So, we're off to GZ in a few hours - it's a 45 minute hop so will be a good trial run for the big show next week.  Since she won't even sit in a chair next to me without a meltdown, I guess she'll be in my lap for a bunch/all of the flight. Sweet!  

But in the end, all these labor pains are worth every bit. Lucy is awesome and when she emerges from her grief for brief periods of time she is such a joy to be with.  She laughs and tickles and giggles and plays peekaboo and talks to her gege (brother) and sings.  Such great potential on the other side of all this crying/grieving.  Please Lord make it soon.

Gotta go!

Just Another Day

Melissa here again.- Trav is still not feeling too well. 

Our day started with a trip to another People's Park.  Our guide, Alison, has been telling us a little bit about Chinese culture each day.  As we were driving to the park she said that the elderly people get up very early to do their shopping at little farmers markets that are set up on the sidewalk usually between 5 and 7 a.m.  Afterwards they go to the park to exercise.  At the park we visited today there was a large, open circle with what looked liked playground equipment.  Upon further inspection we realized that it wasn't meant for children but was actually adult exercise equipment, think Nautilus but outside.  It was all made of metal and will stand up to harsh weather and little kids playing on it.  Further into the park was a small amusement park.  We did venture on one ride that kind of spun around while we shot water at plastic animals in the center.  We didn't have time to go on more of them much to Tyson's chagrin.  There were plenty of rides that I wouldn't have dared go on.  They looked a little too rickety for my taste.  (And we didn't buy the travel insurance for medical evacuation). 

Lucy still isn't a fan of the hotel.  We had to stay around this afternoon though while our guide had some of our paperwork processed.  Afterwards she arranged for a calligrapher to come and make scrolls for our family.  Apparently the lady who came is part of the local calligraphy association and is actually a pharmacist.  She made beautiful scrolls with Tyson and Lucy's names and birthplaces on them.  This type of calligraphy is associated to the Jiangxi province and we hope that it will stay special in their hearts. 

Our pattern of eating is to have a western/Chinese blend for breakfast, Chinese lunch and western dinner.  Tonight's dinner was good old McDonald's.  As soon as we walked in Lucy opened her mouth and was pointing at her tongue.  We think that that is the 'feed me here' sign.  She ate French fries and a little cheeseburger.  It wasn't far away but it was getting dark and was raining.  The sidewalk conditions were no better than on the way to the other park so it was a little stressful getting there.  They have an English menu but the cashier and I still needed a little help getting our order straight.  Apparently me tapping on different pictures doesn't always get across the point that I wanted the whole meal, not just the sandwich.  Somehow I also bought 2 junky little toys that they were selling. 

Tomorrow we leave Nanchang.  As much as I will miss being in Lucy's birth city I want to get her out of this hotel.  She just gets so upset when we're here.  We'll be spending about a week in Guangzhou where we'll be doing the American paperwork.  By tomorrow afternoon she'll have a Chinese passport.  In Guangzhou (GZ) she'll get a medical exam, shots and a US visa. 

Lucy still is extremely attached to Trav.  She won't let anyone else hold her without pitching a fit.  I don't mean whining, I mean 'someone help me this isn't my family' kind of fits.  Poor Trav has to go to the bathroom with her on his lap. 

Many people come up to Tyson and try to talk to him.  He doesn't have any idea about what they are saying and pulls in close to me when they do.  Tonight he did try to copy some of the Chinese characters with a crayon and paper.  It was super cute. 

My prediction is that Lucy will be speaking pretty good English by Christmas.  She seems to pick things up pretty quickly even in this hard stage.  She says candy, G-Pa and tickle tickle. I was able to get her to play with me for a few minutes tonight by bribing her with some Skittles.  I'm pretty sure that I will be going to get some more of them in the morning before our flight. 

Things that Lucy likes: corn with butter, candy, sleeping on dad's chest & steamed eggs.  Things that she doesn't like: me, vegetables, being away from her dad & being told no. 

One thing that I've been processing in my head is that this trip couldn't be any more different than the last trip.  First of all there is the child aspect.  Tyson bonded to us in a totally different way and on a different timeframe.  Another way is harder to explain.  It's like this trip isn't foreign enough.  Both Beijing and Nanchang are almost too familiar even though I've never been to either one before this trip.  Don't get me wrong, things here are different than at home but just not as different as I thought they were the first time around.  The gaps between this country and ours are just not as big as I once thought.  Like I said, I'm still processing this but I just wanted to get it down in writing for some reason.

Well, I hope all of you are doing well.  You are in our thoughts and prayers all of the time.  We brought little pieces of so many of you with us.  I can't help but think of you all in so many ways.  We're using all of the things that you gave us, lent us or recommended to us.  They have all made the trip more pleasurable.  Well, everyone is asleep so I will join them now.  Love and miss you all!

 

Nanchang Central Square

Nanchang Village 2

Village Outside Nanchang 1

Teng Wang Pavilion Pics 4 (lunch)

Teng Wang Pavilion Pics 3

There's that sexy Ergo Carrier - ugly and ungainly but man does it do the job.  Hands Free walking!

Teng Wang Pavilion Pics 2

A Bull in a China Shop

 

 

Hey- Melissa here. Trav left me in charge of the blog because he's feeling a little yucky and frankly he hasn't had 2 seconds to himself.  I'm not sure quite where Trav left off so I'll just catch you up to speed on a few things.

Everyone is asleep in the room. Unfortunately, Lucy doesn't like being in the hotel room or really most places in the hotel.  She was brought to us here at the hotel instead of the Civil Affairs office, which we are grateful for since it gave us 1 more day with her than if we had to wait for the office to open on Monday.  I do however think that this may have something to do with her distress over being in the here.  

In general she was just cranky and cries a lot (rightfully so).  She has incredibly long eyelashes and a fabulous smile.  It's so hard to see the sadness that she has.  I know that she misses her foster family deeply.  It is good for her to grieve but I'm not sure what else could be more painful to watch.

On a lighter note I'm going to add in a few details that you all might not be interested in but I want to preserve somewhere. Yesterday we went to the hotel's indoor pool in the afternoon. We were told that you have to wear a swim cap in the pool by so we bought some at Walmart during our crazed visit there.  When we checked in at the pool they handed me a slinky-type bracelet with a round center and Trav a key on a bracelet.  That's it, no other instructions.  We pantomimed that we didn't know what to do or where to go and they take us to entrances for male and female locker rooms.  We parted ways and I practically ran into a naked lady upon entering the ladies' locker room.  The bracelet was apparently a proximity key for a locker.  I waved my wrist near a locker and the door popped open.  In it was a towel and a pair of pink flip flops.  I took the towel and shoved most of my size 9 boats in to them.  After walking through a few more rooms I toddled my way out to the pool.  Luckily the rest of my family was there and we were able to have a good time in the pool.  With our Wallie World swim caps on we strutted to the pool.  I'm sure it was a sight to see.  Lucy played with Trav and Ty and I played together.  She really has him wrapped around her finger. 

This morning we went to the countryside of Nanchang to get a glimpse into their lives.  There were people in the streets, kids eating ice cream and adults preparing food.  We walked out to the fields and saw rice patties.  From what we understand they are about 7-10 days from harvesting the rice.  The rice was inside of beautiful golden shells.  Dave took pictures, with their permission, of a few of the residents.  They really seemed to enjoy seeing their photos on the digital display.  On one of the 2 main roads men were building a multi story building.  It really was a sight to see these old fashioned wheelbarrows being hoisted by rope to the top of the building.  When I say hoisted I mean that they look like they were practically flying up there.  A lady in our travel group said, 'this looks like San Francisco in the 1800s'.  She was right!

After the countryside visit we had another fabulous authentic Chinese lunch.  My personal favorite is the eggplant.  Tyson of course likes anything spicy and poor Trav doesn't really get to eat.  Lucy is what they call a 'velcro-baby'.  While she is grieving she is stuck to him like glue.  He literally can't go to the bathroom without her.  He doesn't know it but he is super dad.  You should see him with her.  All of her needs are met by him alone.  He changes her diapers, feeds her, carries her everywhere and even does her hair.  I basically get to pick out her clothes and then carry around the backpack all day. 

I used to feel that sometimes a white daddy with an Asian baby stuck out in America.  Well, now I can say that it sticks out WAY more in Nanchang.  Trav has Lucy in our ErgoCarrier (probably the best purchase that we made for the trip) most of the day.  We haven't attempted a stroller but it wouldn't be very practical anyway.  The sidewalks are majorly torn up.  It appears that they are paving them with these large stone pavers but I'm not sure in what order.  The pavers are intact for maybe 200 feet and then boom, dirt or concrete.  Then 100 feet later more pavers.  To say that it isn't 'stroller friendly' is a complete understatement.  We'd probably have better luck getting my feet into tiny little Asian-sized flip flops than getting a stroller safely to the bodega. 

After an unsuccessful nap time we took a long walk to the park.  By long I mean it takes a long time to walk around mini death traps.  The park is one of the 'people's parks'.  It is basically a large concrete park with different kinds of artwork, statues and flags commerating their history.   I met an nice 20 something man and chatted for a moment.  His English is great even though he has never been to the US.  He said that he practices it often and likes to watch American t.v.  Of course I couldn't leave it at that.  I asked his favorite show and he said that right now he is finishing season 5 of LOST.  Apparently the show Prison Break is really popular amongst his friends too.  And the show Heroes is too 'how you say… unreal'.

On the way home we ate at KFC.  Yup, the Colonel is in China too.  Dave asked if I thought it tasted like American KFC but I really don't even know since I can't remember the last time I had it at home.  Lucy likes pretty much anything fried so this was right up her ally. 

Speaking of things Lucy likes and doesn't like.  She likes her Baba, watching KaiLan, eating, her new sippy cup, her pacifier, being carried in her Ergo, her 3 stuff animals and going places.  She does not like: me looking at her or touching her, getting her clothes or diaper changed, putting on any shoes but the ones she came in (and peed in), the hotel and seeing our faces in the morning.  We see her clothes her eyes tightly and then pop them open.  When she sees us she cries and makes a terrible face that says 'ahhhh… you are still here!'.

So, you might be wondering why I titled this post in the way that I did.  Well, I'll give you a little background.  Porcelain is of very high quality here.  The term 'china' started here, as there is a town south of Nanchang with a name something like ChaNang.  As the world was made aware of the great quality porcelain that was made there it was shipped all over.  If you say the name of the town fast enough you may here is as 'China'.  So, over time the name of this type of porcelain was named china.  Soooooo, I digress.  Today we were in a beautiful china shop.  Poor Trav was walking through a threshold and hit his head on a picture.  The picture fell, and knocked over a few boxes of china.  Luckily I learned a little earlier that china does not break easily so we escaped with only one piece broken.  The picture and its frame were so heavy that I had to use 2 hands to drag it off of the boxes.  Trav was initially afraid that we had just bought a few thousands dollars worth of damaged china but later had a laugh that he was just a bull in a china shop. FYI- if you bang two pieces of good china together it sounds like a bell being struck.  The guy was freaking me out smacking china together to make his point.

For our praying friends and family we ask that you continue to pray for us.  We need it!  Lucy still rejects me pretty hard and it's taking its toll on Trav.  He's tired and not feeling that great.  My heart of course hurts that she is so bothered by my presence.  Tyson is a trooper and still tries to serve her and love her even though she rarely returns his affections.  Blogspot is blocked here but if you want to please leave a comment.  It was so awesome for me to read you comments when I returned home last time and I'm sure that it will be this time too.

Well.  I think I will join the family now and get some zzzzzzs.  You all are the best and we can't wait to introduce Lucy to you in person.  I'll try to get Trav to post some more pics tomorrow.

Much love-Melis

 

Teng Wang Pavilion

So, yesterday was so exhausting I fell asleep next to Lucy before I had a chance to blog.  Not that I could have anyways as my brain has turned to mush.  Yesterday was the roughest day with Lucy in many ways.  While we have a bit more of a routine going making the everyday tasks of bathing and dressing and eating a bit better, she spent a lot of the day crying, still working through her grief.  There were some shining moments when we got her to laugh and smile - her eyes get HUGE and absolutely light up when she is laughing.  She is still wholly rejecting Melissa - hardcore - and gave a bunch of grief to Tyson yesterday including hitting him in frustration.  But she still wants him around and starts up the tear factory as soon as he leaves her sight.  As for me, I'm the only one she will let hold her, rejecting anyone else who tries.  It's got to be breaking Melissa's heart but she is being such a champ about it - she's read way more than any of us on how this grieving process works and knows/hopes Lucy will come around eventually.  Melissa says it's called nervous attachment - when the baby has an almost hysterical attachment to only one person - so much so that I can't go to the bathroom or walk across the room to change my clothes without her flipping out.  Apparently, it's not uncommon.  One of the families in our travel group says their first daughter with the husband for almost the whole 2 weeks in China - that little girl is now 7 and on our trip and is wonderfully attached to all the members of her family.  Very encouraging.

Yesterday we went to the Teng Wang Pavilion - a pagoda like tower that is the symbol of Nanchang.  It's like the Golden Gate Bridge or the St Louis Arch.  If you come the Nanchang then you have to visit the Teng Wang Pavillion.  It sits on the river and, although this is a reproduction of one of the original versions of the tower, it has stood watching over the city for over 1300 years.  Don't know how tall it is but it's pretty tall - six levels but each level was very tall.  I don't know if it was the heat, the fluid loss or the height - probably all three - but my head was swimming as we walked around the top to look at the river and the city.  Very pretty if I wasn't about to pass out!  I did much better by the time we worked our way down to the fifth and fourth levels - AC is such a wonder!  The entire time we toured, I had Lucy strapped onto my right hip with the Ergo Carrier - it's like a baby sling on steroids  - straps and webbing everywhere - and HOT!!!  Lucy and I are very tight with lots of sweat shared between the two of us in there. It doesn't help that she insists on carrying 3 of her stuffed animals in there as well.  The things we do for love.  We did that for a few hours and then went to an amazing lunch next door. Chinese not western with tons of food.  The whole group around a big table with a lazy susan in the middle - every traditional chinese meal we have here is like that.  All the food piled in the middle and everyone picks off the plates as they go around.  Spicy beef,  a different kind of really spicy beef, eggplant in sauce, chicken wings, fried rice, sweet and sour pork, roasted corn, shoestring fried potatoes, broccoli and garlic, chicken and green beans and it goes on and on - all for $10 US per family!!!!  KFC cost twice that the other night and it was just...well KFC.

Lucy just woke up for the morning so I'll have to tell you all about her first time in the pool when she goes down for a nap today.  Superdad to the rescue.

TJ

Adoption Day Pics 2

Adoption Day Pics 1

Daddy's Little Girl

So time for a verbal update on this amazing adoption journey.  I can't believe it's only been 24 hours since we got Lucy - it seems like a lot longer since sooooo much has happened in the last day. Everyone is down for a late afternoon nap now so I have a bit of a break to get this out.  But first, let me apologize if the blog looks all crazy - I can't actually see the blogsite at all since it is blocked here in China and I am emailing my post in blind.  So I have no idea what any of this looks like and I can't verify if anything is actually getting posted unless I hear from someone (like my dear sister today) that they got posted.  Additionally, hotmail does not display that any of my emails are 'sent' after I hit the send button.  Very frustrating.  So I probably blew up the blog with the same post of the same three pictures six times this morning - but darnit if i wasn't going to get some pictures out to everyone!

Lucy is the cutest thing in pigtails and is definitely daddy's little girl.  She will not allow anyone else to hold her - she goes nuts.  She screams bloody murder when Melissa even touches her let alone tries to hold her.  In the realm of adoptions, this is not altogether unexpected.  Tyson immediately took to Melissa and merely tolerated me and Melissa's mom for the entirety of the China trip and it took months before Tyson would let me hold him without squirming away.  So, for some reason we can't explain Lucy has latched on to me.  I can' t leave the room without her bursting into tears and she barely tolerated me taking a shower 4 feet from her this am.  Melissa is taking it well - we knew she would probably pick one of us, I just wasn't prepared for it to be me!  I mean I am bigger, taller, hairier and whiter than anyone she has ever seen AND I have an itchy beard.  But there it is. 

Quick summary of events: Arrived at the hotel in Nanchang yesterday midday.  Had just enough time to get our bags unpacked, eat something and get Lucy's stuff organized before being summoned downstairs to Conference Room 2 where we met our darling daughter to be - she had just peed herself and was having a bit of a meltdown.  We were able to take her back to our room in very short order and proceeded to try to get her to stop crying.  The only thing that worked (temporarily) was sitting in my lap with all of her earthly possessions (which turned out to be the stuffed animals and disposable cameras we sent her in a care package) hugged to her chest, sucking on her didi like it was going out of style.  LOTS of tears.  And making a break for the door.  Cheerios and Puffs scored big points and bubbles made a dent in the tears but only if I gave them to her.  The first several hours were very long.  Eventually she fell asleep on my chest and Melis had to go down to the Conf Room to do all the paperwork - that was supposed to be my job but the kid picked me.  Whodathunkit?

I won't get into the comedy of errors that occurred when I tried to slip out of bed to go to the bathroom.  Let's just say it involved lots of tears, three different types of bottles (none of which worked) and a hotpot that blew up scalding milk the temperature of liquid magma all over the counter, wall and mirror of our room.  A special prop needs to go out to my folks who braved the Nanchang summer heat and insane traffic (dodging cars like Frogger) just to get their granddaughter some milk.  Mom had to moo just to get someone to understand what she was looking for.  Way to go Nai Nai and Gpa!!!  They already know the layout downtown Nanchang from all their adventures seeking supplies.

Finally got the wee one asleep somewhere near 9 and we all immediately passed out from exhaustion.

Today was Adoption Day!  It was chaos and nothing like our very ordered oath ceremony for Tyson in Chongqing.  With him there were two adoptions that day and that was it.  Today there must have been thirty families from all over the world adopting kids plus guides and extra family members and the office workers that ran the government agency that controls the adoptions. It was simply nuts...and hot.  I haven't mentioned the heat yet but it is pretty warm here with a high humidity that just melts you; the buildings are semi air-conditioned in SOME places. Most of them are stuffy, hot and humid - stifling.  Don't even get me started with the elevators!  Could it get any hotter in here? And with that darling little girl clinging to me and only me...well, I lost 5 lbs today just sweating.   I'm not kidding, I just weighed myself.  Water has been scarce (until our WalMart run today) and I am "sucked out", as the wrestlers used to say.  That's about it for now - a very long 24 hours.  But she is officially ours and she is SOOOOOOO cute!!! Worth every bit of the hardships I just described and then some.  She is stubborn and opinionated and talks a lot (reminds me of Boo from Monsters Inc just a bit since we can't understand her but she babbles just like her).  The Lord has blessed us with an amazing little girl and we can't be thankful enough.

Well, nap time is almost over so I better post this thing or it may not get posted at all.  Keep up those prayers - they're best way for you folks at home to lend us a hand over here.

TJ